Photography Fees! EEK!

One of the most expensive parts of a wedding can be the wedding photography. Many professional photographers have starting base packages at $2000. If you are having a $10,000 wedding, $2000 for wedding photography just isn't feasible.

Patrick and I had this problem when we were planning our wedding. I have many friends in the wedding photography business - and they are excellent photographers.... there's only one problem - the COST! Instead of paying $2000 for photography, we ended up paying $375! How did we do it? We checked the local classified postings for cheaper photographers. We lucked out in finding someone who had been a photographer full time but now was working at my graduate school. Instead of charging an exorbitant amount and basing her yearly income on her photography jobs - she did photography as a hobby. At the price of $75 an hour and free engagement photos - we just could not say no!

Here's what I would suggest - think outside the box. Many times you can find photographers running specials in the paper or even students studying photography who need some real life experience. And you can always check out my photographer, especially if you are in the Bloomington area: http://www.psphotographyonline.com/.

Couture Silk Invitations

Even though I provide advice on this site for brides who want to save a buck, one of my friends recently started a handmade invitations business. If you are interested in couture silk invitations, check out http://www.revelryinvitations.com/. I love her invitations - they are extremely classy :-)

Wedding Flowers

Most people when planning a wedding want flowers.... lots and lots of flowers. When you visit some florists, however, it's easy to have sticker shock. Many florists will charge upwards of $250 just for a simple brides bouquet! When you add all of the bridesmaid bouquets, flowers for the men, flowers for the parents, and centerpieces, your flower cost can easily total $2000.

It is really easy to cut the cost of your flowers.....

Here is how - first off, decide if you want real or fake flowers. A lot of people will tell you that fake flowers are tacky - but if that is what you want, don't listen to those people. The cheapest way to get fake flowers is to visit Michaels when they are having a clearance :-) One of my friends had fake flowers in her wedding and all of them came from Michaels. They were very beautiful. The plus side of having fake flowers is that they will last! Buy the flowers and make the bouquets yourself. It really isn't that hard.... Check out this site: http://save-on-crafts.com/bouqmakbas.html.

I decided to go with real flowers for my wedding. Real flowers are typically more expensive than fake ones. There are a couple places you can buy real flowers cheaply. If you want to have roses, check out www.freshroses.com (also known as 2G Roses). They have wedding packages that are fairly inexpensive, comparatively. I had a friend who ordered all of her flowers from Fresh Roses (dot) com and they were beautiful. One of the nice things about this site is that you can have a test bunch sent to your house with different colored roses before your wedding to decide on your color scheme. Then you can test how long it takes for the roses to open and how to make your bouquets.

You can also purchase bulk flowers from Costco or Sam's Club. I actually had all of my flowers shipped from Sam's Club. I ordered LOTS of daisies and hydrangea (see pic above). The price for all of my flowers was $150. Not bad for all of the centerpieces and bouquets! One thing to keep in mind about these stores, you need to have a membership to purchase bulk floral from them.

Happy Bargain Hunting!

David's Bridal "One Love" Contest

Win a FREE wedding package from David's Bridal.

David's Bridal has released a new contest: the "One Love" Contest. All you have to do is upload a picture of you and your man, tell them your personal story of how you knew he was "the one," and put together a wedding collage with 6 items from David's. If you are selected to win, you will receive all of the items in your collage.

Enter here:

http://www.davidsbridal.com/onelove1.jsp?cm_sp_o=PybgLdbltCjCBEwkBMwCjCwMwEf5zTw

Dyed Crinoline

Another neat thing to do to set your wedding apart from all the rest is to dye your crinoline. When I found pics online of other people dying their crinolines, I knew I just had to do it. And since my wedding colors were tiffany blue and white - I had to dye it blue!

To begin, I checked to be sure that the material that my crinoline was made out of could be dyed. Luckily all of the crinolines from David's bridal can be dyed. Amanda and I headed off to WalMart and bought some rit dye.

We added the dye to the washer and turned the water to hot. We also took the crinoline to the shower and got it wet before adding it to the washer.

We stuffed it down in the washer and every few minutes would open the washer to redistribute the poofiness ;-)

It turned out to be a beautiful shade of blue. We let the washer run again after pulling out the crinoline and added some vinegar to the wash so that the blue dye would not get on our next load of laundry. We hung it up to dry and it only took a little while.

Wedding Card Box

One of the hip new things appearing at weddings is a variation on the traditional "card box." It is customary to have a box or birdcage at weddings for guests to place their cards in for the couple. What all brides discover when shopping for wedding supplies is that card boxes are very pricey. Many run between $20-$100 ( http://www.weddingcardboxes.com/).


My maid-of-honor and I, however, in my quest for saving money on my wedding, decided to make my card box. My wedding colors were tiffany blue and white, so I wanted to make a card box that looked like stacked Tiffany & Co. boxes. I found some stackable cardboard boxes at a flea-market in Michigan for about $6. I bought the perfect color blue paper at the Card & Party Outlet, and some white sparkly ribbon at Michaels.

Amanda then cut a large opening between the boxes and an opening for the cards in the smaller box lid (see pic above). Then we wrapped the boxes and decorated them with the ribbon. Below was our result. The total cost of our project was $10.

Cheap Bridesmaid Dresses

If you are like me, you want your bridesmaids to be in a dress that is comfortable and won't "break the bank." Today, bridesmaids dresses can cost up to $300 or more. Many dresses also don't look great on every body type. It's hard to find the perfect dress.

Here's my advice: First, check out some dress shops and see what styles you like. If you are having a strapless dress, for instance, you might want your bridesmaids to also wear a strapless gown. You can do almost any type of bridesmaid dress with your wedding dress - but it is key to be happy with the style and material. I was very happy with the bridesmaid dresses at David's Bridal.

If you are having bridesmaids who are different sizes, you will want a dress that compliments all body types. These are hard to come by, but aren't impossible to find. The dress that I decided to go with was a strapless pool blue dress with a rhinestone broach: http://www.davidsbridal.com/bridesmaids_bycolor_detail.jsp?stid=1552&sid=8351&cfid=34.

The way that the dress gathered on one side was very flattering on all of my ladies. I actually tried on the dress myself to make sure that it was "the one."

Another way to make sure that the dress will be comfortable on each of your ladies is to pick a color and a brand, and let each of your bridesmaids pick their own dresses. That way they will be able to pick out something that they like (and might wear again).

There are a couple ways to offset the cost of bridesmaid gowns. First, check out some websites that offer cheap bridesmaid dresses, such as http://www.houseofbrides.com/.

Chadwicks also offers some pretty dresses for special occasions: http://www.chadwicks.com/. They have a nice clearance website as well: http://www.coboutlet.com/.

It's also possible to find a nice dress for all of your bridesmaids at Sears, JC Penney, or Dress Barn. Keep an eye out for sales.

I decided to go with that particular bridesmaid dress because no only was it flattering, but many were offered on ebay for half the price. Two of my bridesmaids actually bought their dresses that way and saved $50 on them. A lot of people also offer their gently used bridesmaid dresses on http://www.craigslist.com/. We found a couple people selling their pool blue dresses there. Sometimes you can be lucky enough to find someone selling a lot of bridesmaid dresses.

Good luck bridesmaid dress shopping!

How To Set Up a Wedding Budget

When it comes to wedding planning - keep your budget in front of you at all times. One reader has asked what I would suggest when it comes to a budget. Patrick and I set a budget at the very beginning of our wedding planning and stuck to it. We ended up saving over $2,000 in the end, primarily by thinking about how much we could spend on certain things and trying to find cheaper services.

Here are the things to include in your budget:

CEREMONY

Aisle runner, Flowers: bouquets, boutonnieres, altar flowers, pew bows/flowers, tossing bouquet, Church fee, Flower baskets for flower girls, Programs, Officiant fee, Organist/sound technician/string quartet, Ring pillow, Unity Candle, Other decorations - candles, petals, Bubbles/petals/etc. to throw

CLOTHING

Alterations, Attendants attire - dresses, gloves, hats, jewelry, shoes, Flower girl's ensemble, Ring bearers' outfit, Groom's tuxedo/suit, cuff links, shoes, tie, hair, Brides ensemble - dress, hair, headpiece and veil, jewelry, makeup, nails, shoes, undergarments

GIFTS

Attendants gifts, Bride and Groom (to each other), Parents, Party favors, Welcome bags for out-of-town guests

RECEPTION

Beverages - bar set up, alcohol, soda, bartenders, Cake - cutting fee, groom's cake, Food - appetizers, salad, meal, etc., Additional meals - for band, photographer, videographer, etc., Centerpieces, Dance Floor, Linens, Restroom toiletries, Space rental, Cake cutting utensils, Champagne flutes, Chairs, Candles, China, Glassware, Serving staff, Silverware, Tables, Tent, Room treatments, Table numbers, DJ

PHOTOGRAPHY

Engagement photos, Photographer's fee, Videographer

STATIONERY

Calligraphy, Escort cards, Thank You Notes, Invitations - inner and outer envelopes - reception cards - reply cards, Map/direction cards, Save-the-dates, Place cards, Postage

TRANSPORTATION & LODGING

Bride and Groom, Guests, Parents, Wedding Party

WEDDING CONSULTANT

Additional staff, Expenses, Fee

RINGS

Engagement, Wedding

OTHER

Wedding gown preservation, Marriage License, Gratuities

Now, you may have noticed that certain things aren't here that you've been thinking about (for instance, the Honeymoon!!). Feel free to use this as a guide and add/subtract as needed.

Question in Bridal Guide about Alcohol

While cleaning out my wedding supplies, I came across a question posed in one edition of Bridal Guide that I think is very relevant to my last post.

"My fiance's family does not want any alcohol served at our wedding. My father, who is paying for the reception, and my fiance and I disagree, but we don't want to upset them. What do you think?"

Answer: "That familiar adage, "You can't please all of the people all of the time," is never more true than when it comes to wedding planning. It seems that there is always a relative or friend who believes that your wedding should only be planned his or her way. I honestly believe that as much as you want to avoid upsetting your fiance's family, they shouldn't dictate their preference to you. It is, after all, your day to shine and your party to plan - however you like. Now, I agree that it would pose more of a problem if his folks were paying for the reception, and therefore entitled to some say in how their money is being spent, but it is your dad who is footing the bill. You and your fiance should discuss the situation with his family and let them know that although you do plan on serving alcohol, it is not meant as a sign of disrespect but that it is what you both want and had planned for your wedding all along. If their request is for religious reasons, then they certainly don't have to imbibe. What is more, many of your other guests may not share their beliefs. If you think some sort of compromise will help ease the tension, and if you are comfortable with this option, offer to forgo hard liquor (you'll save money in the process) and provide beer, wine and soft drinks only."

--couldn't have said it better myself!

Alcohol: A Multi-Faceted Issue

Deciding what type of drinks to serve at a wedding is a sticky situation for many people, especially if your and your hubby-to-be's parents come from different backgrounds. If anyone in your families have particular religious convictions against alcohol, but you want to have alcoholic drinks at your reception, this topic can create drama very quickly.

From experience, I can tell you that deciding whether to have alcohol at your wedding, and then what types of drinks to serve, is no easy task. A bar can be the most expensive part of a wedding.

Here is one rule of thumb: it is your event! You and your hubby-to-be should sit down, determine what you really want on your wedding day, and do what you want.

If you decide to have alcohol, and you want to save a little on the bar tab without looking cheap, try cutting back on the options you offer at the bar. One new trend at weddings is serving a few speciality drinks - especially serving ones that match your wedding colors. For instance, if you are going with a blue color, check out http://absolutdrinks.com/drinks/blue-drinks.aspx. Decide on one type of red and white wine, and one or two types of beer. Having a limited bar will cut down on your final wedding expenses.

If you are able to bring in your own alcohol, buy wine when it is on sale. Buying direct from a winery can also save you some dough. Also, hiring your own bartenders can save you some cash if you go about it in the right way. I had a friend who recently got married and hired some people from her college who were taking bartending classes to serve drinks at her wedding. It was a very smart idea.

You can also always do a complete cash bar, but in my personal opinion, it is not very nice to expect your guests to pay for their own drinks, especially if they have driven a long way to get there.

Do not, and I repeat, DO NOT decide to only serve 1 or 2 drinks per person for a four hour reception. You want your guests to be comfortable and have a good time, and if they have nothing to drink at all, they will want to leave.

Good luck with your decisions.

Store Bargains

I've recently been in 4 Wal-Marts and there are a lot of wedding supplies on sale right now. I found unity candles on sale for $7 (originally $14), a unity candle holder for $9 (originally $20), and favor boxes 50% off. Good luck bargain shopping :-)

Wedding Planning Books

I just discovered that the best place to buy wedding planning books is www.half.com. There are many paperback books that you can purchase there for as little as $0.75. For instance, you can get the most up-to-date Bridal Bargains book (that I talked about in a previous post) for less than $5.

Step 2: Pick a Location

Now that you have set a date, the second step in planning your wedding is choosing your location. Here is about where 20% of your wedding budget comes in.

There are generally two locations that you need to think about - where to have the ceremony, and where to have the reception. Having your wedding at a church can be expensive, especially if you are not a member. Usually there are location/space fees and pastor fees, not to mention a fee for a sound technician. One way to save some cash is to have both your ceremony and reception at the same place.

When deciding on a location for your nuptials, take time to consider hidden costs: if you are getting married in your parents' garden (a nice way to save some dough), you'll need a tent, a dance floor, electrical wiring for the music, and access to bathrooms (which might mean that you'll need portable toilets). If you choose a space without glitz and glamour, you'll probably want flowers and other decorations to spice it up. Sometimes it can be cheaper to marry at a hotel or country club since they are equipped to accommodate weddings. The dance floor may be free (which is what happened with our wedding). You don't have to worry about bathrooms, and they have great ambiance.

Once you have an idea of what type of reception site you would like, make a draft guest list and decide how much you would like to spend. Get online and google wedding spaces where you would like to tie the knot.

Then call the manager of each site that fits your criteria. The number one question to ask is whether the space will be available on your date. Then the bigger question: what's the cost? What's included? Go see the space! Take a friend with you and check it out. Find out whether food can be catered by an outside vendor and whether you have to buy liquor from them (if you are having an open bar). How long can you have the space? Is gratuity included?

If the site is outside, ask about what happens in case of rain. Is it possible to put up a tent on the lawn?

Whenever you try to find a space, remember that no space is going to have everything that you want, and eventually you'll have to determine what is most important to you.

When you are ready to decide on a spot, make sure you get everything in writing.

Good luck!

Marry Our Daughter - Strange!

I stumbled across a very strange website today: MarryOurDaughter(dot)com.

It is a site where people can purchase teenage brides!!!!! Parents supposedly post information about their children and then present a cost for the marriage. Prices range from $5,000 to $70,000.

Here's a testimonial:

"Our 15 year old daughter Mary wasn't very popular and did nothing but mope around the house bringing everybody down, so we decided to marry her off through your site. Now our house is a lot cheerier and we love our new swimming pool and Jaccuzi! We've told our youngest that when she turns 15 we're going to marry her off too!"

Gross and wrong!

Before you get too excited boys, the site is a fake. The person who created the site fessed up to a New York Times' blog:

"Contacted through MarryOurDaughter this morning, Mr. Ordover quickly conceded the page was a parody aimed at drawing attention to inconsistencies in state marriage laws. States consider it a crime for adults to have sex with minors, but they allow kids as young as 12 to get married with parental and sometime judicial permission" (http://www.webpronews.com/topnews/2007/09/12/marry-our-daughter-just-a-hoax).

I wonder how many guys tried to buy brides before finding out the site was a fake......

Step 1: Set the Date!

One of the first thing that you have to decide when planning a wedding is setting a date. There are many things to keep in mind when deciding on you wedding date, especially if you want to save a little money.

If you decide to marry during a holiday, not only will reception halls be harder to reserve due to holiday parties, but it may also more expensive. Vendors (such as bakers, caterers, etc.) may charge more during the holidays.

The month that you marry also matters. Everyone would like to be a summer bride - but certain months are cheaper to tie the knot. Try January through March (but stay away from Feb. 14th).

The day of the week is also important. Choosing something other than a Saturday evening wedding will save you money in the end. A lunch for 100 guests is always cheaper than a dinner for 100.

Wedding Costs are Overwhelming

These days, the average cost of a wedding is around $30,000! Yeah - $30,000! In other words, the cost of a downpayment on a $150,000 house (calculated based on traditional downpayment costs). Personally, I'd rather spend that type of cash on a place where I will live the rest of my life than on one day of my life.

Wedding costs can be overwhelming!

I'm going to let you in on a little secret - you don't have to spend $30,000 to have a beautiful event for 200 guests. You don't even have to spend $20,000 to have a classy affair.

A lot of people who have survived wedding planning will tell you that it always seems that prices of things are inflated as soon as vendors hear the word "wedding." Call up a hall and tell them that you need to see if their space is available for a weekend a year away. Chances are, the hall coordinator will ask what the event is that you need to have at the hall. Tell them that it is for a family reunion or birthday. Get a quote. Tell them "thank you," hang up, and call again tomorrow. Then tell them that you want the same date and that it is for a wedding. See if they give you a different quote.

As soon as vendors hear "wedding," they assume that you are going to spend whatever they price to you for their services.

Here's a video that portrays this idea. If you are engaged - you should watch this with your fiance.

Store Specials

Attention All "Trailer Trash Brides" (i.e. Brides Trying to Save Some Dough):

Last night I went shopping in Big Lots (I'm in there fairly regularly) and I wanted to alert you to some of the wedding items they now have in their store. Hallmark has recently teamed up with Big Lots and has been sending wedding items to their stores. Big Lots now has Hallmark cake toppers (which are really pretty), wedding scrapbooks, picture albums, toasting flutes, and picture frames along with other wedding items. I bought a couple picture frames which were originally $20 and were priced at $4.

Also, Home Interiors Co. has also teamed up with Big Lots. I found lots of sheer white ribbon for $1 per spool. Great buy, especially for those decorating with bows!

My First Marriage Planning Purchase

Patrick and I got engaged on April 17th, 2007. After a week of being on cloud nine, I began to realize that we had a lot to do to throw the wedding we wanted. We set the wedding date - May 17, 2008 - and started thinking about where we wanted to have the wedding. That's where the sticker shock started to creep in. We wanted to have a nice wedding, but did not want to break the bank. Very soon I realized that I wouldn't be able to plan our wedding without a little advice. Hiring a wedding planner would be fairly expensive - most charge around 10% of your wedding budget. I figured someone must have published something on this topic.

I made my way to Borders and searched their very large bridal planning section. If you haven't checked out Border's wedding section, step in there sometime. They have books regarding any type of wedding that you want to throw - even "How to Have an Elegant Wedding for $5,000 (or less)."

I ended up buying a book that I just could not put down: "Bridal Bargains: Secrets to Throwing a Fantastic Wedding on a Realistic Budget." This book has some great advice for any bride trying to pinch pennies during the wedding planning process. The book is well organized. For instance, if you want to save money on your wedding gown, you can flip to the attire section and check out the list of websites offering gowns at low prices. The detail that this book gives is wonderful. I would strongly suggest this book to anyone trying to plan a nice wedding on a low budget.

New Background.... New Purpose

As many of you probably remember, The Trailer Trash Bride was created as a way for me to vent about the stresses that come with getting married. Now the wedding is over.... and a lot of the stress is gone.

I feel as though I have a lot of advice to give to newly engaged couples, especially those trying to plan a beautiful wedding on a small budget. I did it myself - from buying my centerpieces at Goodwill to buying my dress at a consignment shop. I also believe I can offer advice on family stresses during the pre-ceremony time.

This blog is therefore dedicated to providing advice to those who seek it.

Read on... and enjoy!!

To all my past readers

Sorry that I escaped into the abyss for a while....

I plan to be back soon - better than ever! :-)